Its name is Treo and it dances on the sand

Actually it doesn't.

It also doesn't:
1. Allow me to call anyone.
2. Turn on all the way? How is it that the PDA is on, but the phone is off? Ri-diculous.
3. Show everything on a website. It does me no good to see bits and pieces of a website. I need the whole thing.

So, I have this monstrosity of a cellphone/PDA. Which I shouldn't complain about because my work bought it, and pays the bill for it. But work doesn't have to carry that thing. They bought the Treo. And the accompanying car charger, headpiece thingie, and belt clip. Let me tell you something about the belt clip. You can clip a brick to your belt, but that doesn't make it any more convenient. You could put two Treos end to end (which is a position it ends up in on its swivel-belt-clip) and the Treos would cover my entire waist. They are ridiculously large. And heavy. I could clip it to my scrub pants, but not only would I look like a derelict, my pants would fall down.

Also, I'm pretty sure this thing will eventually cause my death. I was trying to dial a number from it yesterday, and walked straight into an oncoming gurney in an emergency room. Didn't even notice because I was too busy trying to dial with the stylus without hitting any number twice. You can have steady hands and this thing will make you wonder if all that alcohol really is doing something to your body. You're going to doubletap, and then the paranoia sets in. And if I don't end up walking into traffic while trying to make a call that, even when dialed, won't go through? I'm probably going to get mugged. Walking down the street with a giant piece of electronics and a stylus?! Tar-get.

So, I guess that if I read the manual, I might end up liking the Treo. But for now, it is a monumental pain in the neck. On the bright side, carrying the Treo is like carrying a really big rock. If someone does try to mess with me, at least I have something to chuck at them.