Voicemail
Dad: (softly) Hey Samantha, it's your Dad. Your Aunt Mary* has passed away.
Mom yelling in background
Dad: Well, okay, we're not sure if she's dead. Anyways, we need you to go to her house and check. I mean, knock on the door and pretend like you're just coming to visit her and Tommy**. You know, if you walk in and she's sitting in a chair, don't scream or anything. Just be subtle. You know what I mean. Then report back and let us know if she's still around. Anyways, call us back and I'll give you directions to her house. Love you. Thanks. Bye.
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*Aunt Mary is over 90 years old, approximately 4' tall, and mean as a snake. She has a big wooden cane and she hits you with it. She doesn't really get up anymore, but back when she was mobile, that lady was dangerous. So, don't feel bad when Dad's a little mean about her. Honest to God, totally beats people with her cane.
**Tommy is her son who's about 70 years old. He will talk you to death. Or at least until you pray for death...kind of loudly under your breath. He's monotone and wants to tell you every minute detail about everything that's ever happened in the history of the world. Ever.
posted by mance01 @ 16:39
5 Comments:
why do you have to go see her? your dad would rather not get beaten with the cane? "need to check on aunt Mary? oh, I know, call Sam!"
exactly. i think they didn't want to call cause they'd have to be talked to death.
What the heck happened..is she dead or what?! Geez....
Oops! Sorry about that. I'm bad about follow-up sometimes. :) She has passed away, but she was 96 years old, so she probably feels better now. laters!
This. Is. Hilario. Can't. Stop. Laughing.
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