Attack!!

How to use your dog to meet women:

1. Keep the dog on a leash. When the dog comes loping after the girl while she's still in her fancy pants work clothes and 3-inch heels, she's only excited to meet the owner so she can berate him for his irresponsibility.
2. Make sure the girl actually likes dogs. When the dog is running toward the girl and her face is contorted in a look of horror for what the dog is about to do to her, it's a pretty sure sign that she's not going to be that excited to meet you. Dogs are fine...large stranger dogs are not.
3. If you're going to leave the dog off the leash, train it. For instance, if your dog doesn't know that jumping and biting are wrong...that dog probably needs to be on a leash.

I got home from work, was walking toward the apartment, heard the dog running toward me, and was next being scratched to pieces by it. I have big scratches on my stomach, a rip in my pants, and a bite on my hand. Luckily nothing broke the skin. Guy runs up to me, grabs the dog, sees my namebadge from work and before apologizing about the dog starts to make small talk. "So, what do you do?" and the like while beaming at me.

You set your dog loose on me. Your dog's favorite food is PEOPLE. Not cool, dude.

Also, you owe me a pair of pants.