Texas: PIG...SUEY! edition

So we spent most of our time in Texas shopping, since we went the Monday before Christmas and I had zero Christmas shopping done. There are many many many places to shop in Texas. The place is a giant strip mall. 'Nuff said.

Wednesday night, we decided to go to a comedy club Open Mic night. We got to the comedy club insanely early, so we decided to go ahead and start drinking. We get to the door and there are a lot of people. A lot. Especially considering the show didn't start for another hour. And it was an Open Mic night. And they were all wearing red. We walk in the door and there are red balloons all over the place and EVERYONE is wearing red. And there are many old men with beer guts. But there are also attractive young men without beer guts. The problem was that they were wearing clothes so similar to their aged counterparts that it was far too easy to imagine them in the future. With beer guts.

Turns out we'd walked into a University of Arkansas alumni party. Complete with signs. And recruiting materials. Materials that stated "...diverse cultural and recreational activities in the Fayetteville area enhance the college experience." Yeah. I bet. I didn't see one African-American, Asian-American, or Latino in a red sweatshirt. But whatever. There were signs, there was band music (as in the music that the band plays in the bleachers at the football game) blasting through the house speakers, there were goofy looking people, and for the love of God there were cheers. Really. A 40-year-old man (if not older) walked onto the stage, up to the mic, and (I kid you not) yelled "PIG!" What was frightening is that immediately after, everyone else in the room starting lifting their arms and once they reached the top of their trajectory yelled "SUEY!" (I have no idea how to spell the type of suey to which pigs respond.)

Of course, C and I had chosen a table riiiiight in front of the microphone. Making it impossible, if not dangerous, not to cheer. So, we decided to try to blend with the natives. We let out a weak "suey" and applied some camouflage. Luckily we made it out alive. And without marrying a cousin. ;)