Things that Happened to Me Last Night

1. I ate cupcakes and cheesecake brownies at a bar. Because C can't go anywhere without baked goods. And that is why I love her so.
2. I did a shot of Patron. (I'm sure there's an accent mark on there somewhere, but I lack both the knowledge and will to add one.) It was really cold. I probably should have done that shot prior to losing all sensation in my tongue. Probably a wasted $9.25.
3. I knew that Mitt Romney thinks that the garden of Eden was in Missouri.
4. I did not know to dial 8-1-1 prior to digging.
5. I had a song called "Strokin'" dedicated to me and was required to go up and dance on the stage area. "I stroke it to the east, I stroke it to the west, I stroke it to the woman that I like best..." My friend Elizabeth loves this song and swears it will be the song of the first dance at her wedding. I totally believe her.
6. I drank what probably amounted to half a bottle of rum. (Which is why my liver spent today trying to punch me in the face.)
7. I rode home in a cab whose headlights didn't work. At 2 AM.
8. I spent one of my last nights in Birmingham with all the people that I love the most.
9. I realized how much I'm going to miss everyone.
10. I contemplated how many of them I could fit in the back of a U-Haul.

Quote

We're all leaving Innisfree after trivia.

C: "My car is far....That is rhymes."
C's roommate: "Um...do you need a ride home?"

The Days are Just Packed

I'm moving in 11 days, but I have a feeling that the day is going to creep up on me much faster than I think. Primarily because I am staying extraordinarily busy in these final days.

Last weekend I went home for the last time before the move. My sisters and I (minus Jessica) hung out, went bowling, and spent a lot of time going over how things are done in Boston. Such mind-bending questions as "How do they wash their cars in Boston?" and "Do people even wear shorts up there?" were answered. I'm pretty sure my younger sisters think I'm moving to a polar ice cap. It was a lot of fun though, despite the fact that it rained non-stop. We went to Chili's, ordered an ungodly amount of food, were all sitting there clutching our stomachs, and Bear ordered cake. "Bear, I don't think I'm going to be able to eat cake." "Then quit eating your food. Save room for cake! You've gotta have priorities." So, we ate until we were sick and then bowled until the wee hours of the morning. It was a blast. :) I mean, who wouldn't miss faces like these? (and who knew Bear's eyes could do that?) :

I got back to Birmingham on Sunday evening in time to hang out with C and P. We decided to go to dinner and then see Ratatouille. We had Japanese food, and let me tell you a little something about the seafood pasta at this particular restaurant. You might assume shrimp...maybe some scallops...perhaps a crab leg. But you would be wrong. P got her food, I looked over... "Um...is that a tentacle?" Her pasta was chock-full of squid-y goodness. Actually squid and octopi, because there were tiny squids, but there were also honest to God tentacles with little suction cups I kid you not. Luckily I'm a vegetarian, and quickly lumped octopus tentacles into the meat category. Blech. Of course, I guess it was better than octopus ice cream. Skip to 3:30 on this bad boy

Then we saw Ratatouille. If you haven't seen this movie, go now. See it on the big screen. Not only is it really well-written and adorable, it also has the most amazing animation ever. The wet fur, the singed fur, the dry fur...hell, see it for the fur. Also see it because it is like watching Food Network with rats. I totally love Food Network, but this movie definitely gives that channel something to aspire to. Giving the audience an appreciation for food and fresh ingredients, rather than giving the audience the quickest way to throw together preservative-laden foods (I'm talking to you, Sandra Lee. Put down the Cheez-Whiz! Also, you may want to think about AA.) was really refreshing. I am not a cook by any means, but I really enjoyed watching the culinary touches to this movie. Apparently Anthony Bourdain was an advisor and he later reviewed the movie talking about how much they got right about life in a restaurant kitchen. I'm a huge fan of Bourdain's books, so I appreciate that the movie aspired to authenticity along with absolutely nailing the animation and having a wonderful story to boot. Awesome movie for any age. Go go go see it now.

Then I went out again Monday night! I'm telling you, I haven't just laid down and vegged out on my couch for like a week. Which is probably healthy, but whatever. Last night we went to the Alabama Kick-Off party for Barack Obama's campaign. I don't know who I'll be voting for yet, but I thought I'd like to hear what he had to say, and if by some chance he wins, when will be the next time I'll get to say I saw the President in person?!? (Actually, that's already happened to me once. President Bush's motorcade drove 10 feet in front of me when I was in DC a few years ago, but I wouldn't categorize my reaction to that as "excited" by any means. Ugh.)

The whole kick-off thing was pretty low-key...it's hard to get a large group of Democrats together in Alabama. First some little 9 year old girl read a letter she'd written to Obama, and I guess it was cute. I didn't pay a lot of attention since I'd just gotten there and had found a couple of my friends in the audience. Then some Birmingham drum line performed. Poor kids performed and then stood there holding their drums for almost the entire event. They finally gave out in the last 15 minutes or so. Then Charles Barkley came out to introduce the guy who was going to introduce Obama. I hate when people do that. You know who we're here to see, we don't need a cavalcade of people leading up to the guy. Particularly Charles Barkley who I don't care for at all, but who is probably trying to ride some coattails to the Governor's office. Barkley introduced Artur Davis who is a Congressman representing Alabama's "Black Belt." Which is the most impoverished part of the state. It's pretty much the equivalent of a 3rd-world country down there. Pitiful. I've met Congressman Davis before when I helped plan a meeting with local leaders about HIV/AIDS in Alabama. I love Congressman Davis. He works really hard, he's sincere in what he does, he's extremely intelligent, and he's a genuinely nice guy. After Obama spoke, I realized that I wished Congressman Davis was running for President. He'd get my vote hands down.

Finally it was the moment everyone was waiting for. The drummers are drumming, and they introduce "The next President of the United States, Barack Obama!" He came out, thanked everyone that had preceded him, and began his speech. And I felt, well, not really disappointed because I don't think I had really high expectations. But, I expected more. He gave a really safe speech that I believe you probably would have seen from any of the Democratic candidates. Hope for the future, America wants change, we never should have gone to war, blah blah blah. He certainly didn't say anything I disagree with, but there were no revelations. I was promptly reminded following his speech that we are still 18 months out and that it's doubtful that the candidates want to show their hands this early in the race. That makes sense. I've read some articles by Obama's advisors on issues such as the healthcare crisis, and I've really liked what they've had to say. I think if these are the kinds of guys that have Obama's ear, he may be a really great candidate. I just think he's going to need to be a little more charismatic to gain the attention of the majority. There's plenty of race yet to be run, and I'm confident that he'll improve. My big fear is that Hilary Clinton, despite her qualifications, will be unable to win the election. I just don't think she can win. The Democratic nomination seems to be pretty much between her and Obama, so I'm rooting for Obama. I just want a Democratic candidate who can win. We'll see what happens though.

After Obama, we went to trivia night at Innisfree. As usual, our team didn't really know many of the answers and we just battled to stay afloat amidst the teams with 12 people. An even dozen really seems to be the key to full knowledge coverage. You get 12 people, there's always going to be at least one person with an inkling of what the stupid answer is. Next Monday is my last night at trivia. If you're in town, feel free to come and help fill the team out. We need warm bodies. And there's cold beer. You really can't beat that. :) Laters!

Why Everyone Needs a Blog

Coworker: "Speaking of food, we have to take a break from Rojo. Remember how we got lunch from there on Wednesday? I think I had a bad batch of chicken burrito. After you left the office, I got deathly ill. I felt *horrible* but I was on second call, so I couldn't leave. I sat in my office hunched over a trash can the rest of the day. I finally gave in at about 4:30. I went into the command center, told them I had to go home, and I left. Well, about halfway home, I realize I have to go to the bathroom. I mean *go* to the bathroom. But I think I can make it to the apartment. So, I am swiping my card at the gate, and I lose it. Needless to say, I didn't make it to the bathroom. And that's just the beginning. I get out of the car, completely covered in crap. It's all over my pants, my shoes, everything. Luckily, I'm in scrubs. I get into the apartment, get cleaned up and just decide to throw everything away. I'm too lazy to deal with it, plus it's disgusting. So, I throw my clothes, shoes, everything in a garbage bag, walk out to the dumpster, and throw it out. I get back to the apartment, lay down...and immediately realize that my wallet was in my pants pocket. And that my pants pocket is in the giant apartment complex dumpster. I am angry and sick and now I have to go dumpster diving. So, I walk out of the apartment and head toward the dumpster, and who stops me but that guy who's always outside working on his car. I see that guy all the time, never talks to me. Of course the day that I shit myself and throw my wallet in the dumpster, he wants to share his life story. Sam, I'm serious, he talked to me for 30 minutes. I know everything about him. I finally tell him that I have to go dumpster diving, and HE WANTS TO HELP ME. I didn't really feel like sharing my saga with a total stranger, so I just told him I accidentally threw away my wallet. But I'm having to convince him not to hop in the dumpster with me because I would be totally mortified if this guy climbs in and sees what I'm looking for. I finally talked him out of it."
Me: "Did you actually jump into our dumpster? It's like a 5 foot drop from the platform onto God knows what."
Coworker: "Well, I figured the worst thing I could land on would be a bag of human excrement, and since that's what I was looking for anyway, it would be fine. I found it pretty quickly. Then I had to jump up, grab the rim of the dumpster and claw my way out of there. It was pretty much the worst day of my life."
Me: "You really need a blog."

Fond Memories

Tonight was my downstairs neighbor/coworker/friend's birthday. So, C and he and I went out for dinner and drinks.

Scene: Sitting on the restaurant patio. A man walks out onto the patio and sits at a table behind me, but still in plain view of C and S.
C: "That's him! That's the lawyer who I had a big crush on and sent you a link to his picture and you said he was ugly!"
Me: "Oooh. Yeah, that dude is hideous."
S: "What are you talking about?"
Me: "C has a crush on that big ugly dude over there."
C: "His wife used to work with you guys."
Me: "Really? Who?"
C: "You're the one that told me she worked there!!"
Me: "I have no idea who you're talking about."
S: "What's her last name?"
C: "B******"
S: "Oooh, yeah, I remember Jen B****. She was the one in the lesbian tryst!"
C: "HUH??! Samantha why didn't you tell me about this?!?"
Me: "I didn't tell you about that? Wow. Yeah, that's a good story."
S: "So, Jen was married, but she also thought she might be a lesbian. And we had this other chick in the office, K, who definitely was a lesbian. So, she and Jen had a little one night stand, but then Jen decided she didn't want to do that anymore so she kind of broke up with K the next day at work."
C: "I can't believe you didn't tell me this."
Me: "I forgot. Sorry."
S: "K was crazy, and did not take it well. In fact, she reached out and started choking Jen. Jen starts waving her arms trying to get anyone to help her. She finally breaks free of K and starts running toward [our boss's] office. But, K tackles her and hangs on to her legs. At this point, Jen is screaming our boss's name, dragging K along the floor going to the boss's office."
C: "Why aren't you guys helping her?!?"
S: "Are you kidding? By this point we were all sitting around eating popcorn! Who's gonna break up something *this* good? So, the boss finally comes out of his office and when he does, K runs back to her office, locks the door, and takes a massive dose of painkillers. We had to get the fire department and ambulance to come get her and take her to the hospital. She was fine, but we also had to hire a bodyguard for Jen for about a month because K had sent her threatening letters."
C: "Nice."
S: "The weird thing is, I thought Jen's husband was a nurse."
C: "No, he's a lawyer, but they're divorced."
S: "No, Jen's still married. We must not be talking about the same person. Are you sure about the last name?"
C: "No, but Samantha said she worked with you guys. Remember Samantha? You said she sucked at her job and everybody hated her?"
Me: "Oh! You mean Stephanie P****!"
C: "Yes! That's her name!"
S: "Oh. That's not a good story. She was just ugly."

The Bermuda Triangle

So, I haven't posted a lot lately because much like Adina, I've been busy. Busy with life and busy with attempts at making life-changes. I haven't really wanted to write about anything, because in the past I've gotten really excited about big changes, and then they haven't worked out. And then everyone who knew would ask me what happened and I'd have to explain over and over again why I was not currently practicing medicine, living in New York, or training helper monkeys. Pretty much taking inventory of my broken dreams. I've stayed in Alabama, I'm working in a job I enjoy but with crazy management and little chance at advancement any time in the near future, and I don't currently own any monkeys. Also, my boyfriend lives 3,000 miles away. The situation is *not* ideal.

But I have been working to rectify that.

When I first got out of graduate school, I applied for tons of jobs for which I was not qualified in a desperate attempt to flee the state that holds people in its clutches until they die or all their teeth fall out. Whichever comes first. Alabama has never been very high on my list of places to live. Granted, I live in Birmingham, and it's really not terrible. There are lots of intelligent, well-meaning people here...it just seems as though nothing much ever changes. Sure, newer Wal-Marts crop up now and again, but other breakthroughs are few and far between. I do a job that I love in a place that sets the benchmark for how poorly said job can be accomplished in the nation. And I have the best friends I can imagine ever having...and I will miss them terribly.

Because I'm moving on. Today I accepted a new job. This new job entails doing only the parts of the job that I truly love, and none of the crap that I hate. I will not be zipping around in rocket-propelled paper towel tubes in the middle of the night. I will not be sitting in an office all day doing nothing. I will not be wasting my talents spending my day playing the "see if you can get a coworker to stare at someone's broke-over ass by pointing at it and saying hey is that yours?" game. (Btw, I totally suck at that game.) Instead I will be doing clinical management. I will be writing research papers that will hopefully be published in clinical journals. I will be taking call from home. I will be working with an organization that leads the nation in my field. And I will be doing a ton less work for a ton more money.

I will also be living within a 50 mile radius of my boyfriend. Because my new job is in Boston. I've already gone apartment hunting, and have hopefully found a place (assuming said place wasn't rented in the 3 weeks it's taken for me to get this job solidified.) I cannot describe to you how I feel about this. I will be living in Boston. An honest-to-God city. With people. And little blue penguins. And mass transit. And itty bitty expensive apartments (wtf Boston?) And baseball. Lots of baseball. :)

I've been waiting for this for a really long time. And now that it's happened, it's incredibly surreal. I can't imagine not living in Alabama. I can't imagine not being able to hop in the car and go hang out with my family. I can't imagine not being around for the next crazy-ass thing that C does and not having P come and fall asleep at my apartment after her exams. I'm going to miss the terrible food at El Cazador with R and S (although I'll miss the margaritas more.) And I really will have to pinch myself when seeing Tom doesn't include changing planes in Baltimore. But I'm excited to have my friends visit. I'm excited that I'll be able to be the reason that my sisters hop on an airplane for the first time in a decade (and for Jo, the first time ever.) Most of all, I'm excited to start a path in my life that isn't a compromise. That isn't short-term. That isn't just something I'm doing until something better happens.

I'm starting fresh. I'm going new places. I'm meeting new people. Oh, and in my new job I will occasionally have to traverse the Bermuda Triangle. (No joke.)

Welcome to my new life. It's going to kick ass.

Interview

So I'm doing this interview thing via Tom's blog. His instructions to me were to answer the questions in order, without reading ahead. Here we go.

1. Who is your favorite superhero, and why?
Wolverine. Because he's played by Hugh Jackman. Plus the ability to survive a gunshot wound to the head is bad-ass.

2. You're an evil genius bent on world domination - what do you call the legitimate business entity used as a front for your evil organization?
Hmm...I dunno. Something like LifePlus or SurgiPro...because we will manufacture something used in surgery. I could afford to *buy* the world if I could just invent something used in surgery. Seriously. That's my goal. Just one tiny piece of plastic that's used in a common surgery. Appendectomies, tonsillectomies, gastric bypass, or CABG. I would be a gajillionaire.

3. (a) Name six of your closest friends or family members.
C, P, Bear, Scott, Richard, Brett

3. (b) If you and those six people were stranded in a desolate wasteland (tundra, glacier, iceberg, desert, savanah, Kansas), who would you eat first to stay alive?
(haha kansas) Probably Brett.

3.(c) How did you choose?
He's the meatiest.

4. Given the current state of the crude oil market, increasing threat of hostile nations arming for nuclear war, current shortage of blood and organ donors, and advances in computer technology, which of the following scenarios do you think the most likely: The Postman, Road Warrior, The Matrix, or,Terminator?
I'm tempted to go with "The Postman" because that's the only occupation which is currently available. Although with email that position is probably not the wave of the future. And soon we won't be able to afford gas so lets rule out "Road Warrior." Also, Arnold looks like hell. Lets go with "The Matrix." Because it's an awesome movie (And it's the only one of the choices that I've actually seen/know anything about.) Although to survive in that much leather we'll probably need some sort of nuclear winter to happen first. I'm sitting in Alabama in a tank-top, shorts, windows open and a fan blowing on me. I couldn't imagine wearing some skintight vinyl number at the moment.

5. What is the most crucial public health issue facing the global population in the next decade?
Really depends on what you're talking about. Developed or developing nations? Elderly populations? The young? There's a ton of different stuff. If you're an old person in the US, it might be drug-resistance. If you're a 25 year old woman in Africa, it might be AIDS. Depends on the situation.

5. (optional clarification): Facing the US? Facing Africa? Europe? China?
Haha...see, this is where the reading ahead would have been helpful. :-p
Facing the US, I would still want to break it down into subcategories but without going too deep I would have to go with drug resistance and obesity. It's a huge web of interconnected problems spanning in all directions. Doctors overprescribe antibiotics, but they're forced to because if they miss treating a bacterial infection they'll get sued, and they're already paying malpractice premiums that are so high they're discouraging people from practicing medicine blah blah I could go on for days. The other big thing in the US is obesity. People are looking at it as an aesthetic problem, and a personal problem. People shouldn't be fat, it's their own fault for getting that way, we shouldn't have to spend money on educating people about this because it's their own fault. The thing is, even assuming those things are true, the US public suffers the consequences. Overweight and thin alike. We're all paying increased health care costs because hospitals are having to buy special equipment for these patients. It's much better to pay for prevention than the gajillion dollars in healthcare costs overweight people accumulate through the variety of comorbid conditions and procedures that result from their condition.
Facing Africa, the big thing is HIV/AIDS. But that too is a result of a number of equally important conditions. Malnutrition, poverty, social norms, these things all work together to create an environment in which the disease can thrive. AIDS in Africa is no different than AIDS in the US or Europe or South America. The difference is the way its been dealt with. Seriously thinking about Africa makes me cry. So I'm moving on.
I'll assume Europe has a lot of the same problems as America public-health wise. I haven't done a lot of research into their situation.
China is eventually going to have a reproductive health crisis if they keep up their social norms of aborting female children. Their attempts at population control are going to eventually lead to a shortage of females with which to procreate. You're going to end up with mail-order brides that may have been prostitutes in the past (VD), mail-order brides that don't have STDs but still end up being the victims of abuse (studies have shown them to be a high-risk group for that type of thing), and those men that can't afford to buy a bride and end up as very sexually frustrated young men wandering around with too much testosterone in their system (increased violence and sexual assault rates.) Hopefully they'll fix that before it becomes a huge problem.

5. (bonus): How do we stop it?
Public health education. In all of these situations we need a plan, we need people to execute, and sweet baby Jesus do we need funding. Even in the US, where we spend more money on healthcare than anything else, we don't put any money into public health. We've got all these advanced treatments and world-renowned surgeons and what's billed as the best healthcare in the world. If bird-flu broke out right now, we would be completely screwed. We have NO public health infrastructure, no funding. "Oh, but we have a great health department blah blah blah." No you don't. The majority of health departments in the US are staffed by people that know nothing about public health. They know you should eat healthy and wash your hands. And that's why the US has these public health problems. The government is unwilling to pay money to qualified people. I have a master's degree in public health and every one of us in that school knew that we were not there for the money. Cause there's none to be had. Unfortunately it's going to take a major crisis in US health for somebody to step up and call for the funding we need to build a system that works. We'll see what happens.
Africa, God love them, doesn't have the money to spend. So there are tiny little satellite efforts at public health education. And don't get me started on Africa's inability to afford antiretrovirals. All I will say is that the CEOs of some of these US pharmaceutical companies are going straight to hell. Also, I love Brazil.
Seriously I could talk about public health all day. I'm going to cut myself off. But if any of you end up in government positions, remember. We need public health. Badly.

Want to play along? Rules of the game:
1. Send an email saying, “Interview me”, or words to that effect.
2. I will respond by emailing you five questions of my choosing.
3. You will update your blog with the answers to the questions.
4. You have to include this explanation, and an offer to interview someone else in the same post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them five questions...

Ramblings

My shift ends at 7 AM. Which means that I will have been awake for 24 hours in another hour and a half. Which also means that I'm at that point in the day when everything is fascinating to me. And I think deep thoughts.

- If you were a chocolate bunny, would you eat yourself? My answer would be yes. A coworker brought everyone a chocolate bunny for Easter. I ate mine straight out of the office mailbox. At 8 AM. Then I ate my office-mate's bunny because he didn't want it. 5 minutes later. If I were made of chocolate, I'm pretty sure I'd eat myself. Couldn't help it.
- I could probably wallpaper my living room with Hershey's kisses wrappers. Every Valentine's Day my father buys me a "tin" of assorted Hershey's chocolates. And by "tin", I mean "drum." And by "drum" I mean, "suitable for reuse as a missile silo." It's literally at least 10 pounds of assorted candy. By 2 weeks in, it's a tin of Hershey's kisses. Because the Krackles, Mr. Goodbars, Reese's Cups, and Dark Chocolate Minis don't make it very long. Search and destroy babay. So I've taken it upon myself to eat all the chocolate before I move. Because everyone's gotta have goals. So, I have a drum of chocolate by the couch and a jar of peanut butter on the coffee table. Because Hershey's kisses are only acceptable when smothered in peanut butter.
- The "Great American Country" channel is somehow watchable at 5:30 AM. Maybe that's because I can't really hear anymore. It's more of a buzzing noise.
- Have you ever bought moisturizing bodywash that is *too* moisturizing? I bought some weird bodywash with bodycreme ribbons or something. Sure, my skin is soft and moisturized. But water also beads and deflects off me now. I feel like I've showered with Rain-X.
- Ooh. My car broke. The service engine light came on. My friend told me to get the code read at an express oil place and if it was just a sensor or something, he'd fix it for me. Took it in. "Uh..ma'am? That's not a good code." "Uh huh. What is the code?" "Transmission Component Slipping." "Would that explain the giant clunk emanating from my hood on the way to work this morning? And the kickback everytime I accelerate?" "Um...probably." "So can you fix it?" "You need your transmission rebuilt." "Greeeat." I was contemplating just junking my truck because holy crap it is a piece. But then I realized that my truck is paid for. And even a 2 grand investment all at once is better than starting a car payment. And paying higher insurance rates because my car would actually be worth stealing. So repair it is! Woo! Also, I blame all my auto woes on starting a savings account. I've never had problems I couldn't afford to fix. Which amounted to having no problems cause I couldn't afford to fix them anyway. I guess they were right. Mo' money, mo' problems.
- C got burgled. Again. I don't want to say much because I don't want to jinx myself. But she gets burgled more than anyone I know. I think it stems from owning things worth burgling. My robbers would be greeted by a $25 DVD player and a really heavy non-plasma television. Here's the other thing. C has a rottweiler. A ROTTWEILER. And she has been robbed twice in the past year. Robbers have walked into her house. And the dog didn't eat them. Ridiculous. Of course, the robbers this time were a little smarter. They brought barbeque and fed it to the dog. I think C should start pricking her finger to train the dog to develop a taste for blood. Of course, I guess that's step one in dying alone and being eaten by Alsatians. But whatever. If I'm losing my tv, you're losing a limb.

Okay, back to working. And country music television. Laters! :)

I've Got People Skills!!

So I don't really have anything to blog about...but I don't want my blog to circle into oblivion like so many dead goldfish. So, here's the insignificant stuff that's going on :)

• I get to attend "People Skills Training" next month! Woo! Rumor has it that this is in direct response to one of our coordinators going bat-shit crazy at an emergency room when his ex-girlfriend had her CAT scan read by a veterinarian rather than a physician. First of all, don't get your knickers in a twist. Maybe they thought they'd actually scanned a cat. Or maybe this vet was an MD as well. No matter what, I would assume the hospital contracts this service with him because he knows what he's doing. I do not believe this to be a valid excuse for throwing chairs in the waiting room or pinning an ER physician to a wall. Also, I don't understand why the rest of us have to be punished with a four-hour training session on professionalism. Especially since he wasn't even at work when it happened. The official stance was that we are in a job where we represent our organization 24-7, whether we're working or not, no matter where we are. Which is ridiculous, but whatever. I just hope no one finds the publicly posted picture of my co-worker and I dancing drunk on top of a bar. I'm pretty sure that kind of thing isn't included in the mission statement. :-p
• My laptop caught a virus. I had our IT guy at work fix it. Of course, my definition of "fix it" is to remove the virus. His version is to remove everything, reinstall only things work-related, and then refuse to reinstall anything I might need to have fun on this laptop. No Flash...I can't even see the little clock in my blog's sidebar. No YouTube videos. I might crumple up and die soon.
• S and I went to C's house last night and watched "Happy Feet." If you haven't seen it, you should. It's adorable. And it has a nice environmental message too. Of course, it'll make you want to shoot yourself for having ever eaten a fish and stolen from the mouths of penguins. But then you think about sushi and glory in the fact thatyou're higher up in the food chain. Because sushi is the best.
• While at C's house last night, we made a DiGiorno Four-Cheese pizza. Pulled it out of the oven, and we can't find her pizza cutter. No problem, just give me a knife and a cutting board. She hands me a serrated steak knife and points to the rack the pizza's sitting on. "I can't cut it with this, on that!" "Ugh. I don't want to pull out a cutting board. Can't we just use scissors?" "Huh?" "I think it'll work." C cut the pizza into slices with a pair of scissors. It totally worked. Apparently laziness is the mother of invention.

Today I have to clean my apartment. We'll see if that happens. :-p

Email

Remember how I professed my love for Burt's Beeswax chapstick in the last post? When I realized how great it was, I convinced one of my friends to purchase some for herself. A couple of days later we had this discussion via email.

Her: "ok....um.....yea.......Burts Beeswax.....not so much. I saw that you have blogged about this wonderful new product and I myself am slathering it on my unchapped lips the past few days but today I noticed something very disturbing on the tube. In addition to wonderful and wholesome things like cococunt oil, sunflower oil, vitamin e, peppermint, rosemary etc. it is 50% PLASTIC. Yes, post-industrial, recycled plastic. How should I feel about that? Please inform me of my opinion. Thank you dear wise friend."

Me: "I'm pretty sure that the 50% post consumer plastic is the *tube* that the chapstick comes in. Also, i'm pretty sure you're a moron. :-p (j/k) Don't doubt the greatness of the Burt's.

Her: "Omg, I am a moron. Please dont tell anyone about this although I am pretty sure you will."

Me: "um...yeah. i'm going to blog about it."

Her: "yay!! finally i am featured on a blog after six long years of trying friendship :-) ok so i have been trying to think of something really dumb you said....remember: "*This quote removed by blog editor*"? Yea--Bitchslap....you deserve it."

Congrats, you made it to the blog. Unfortunately the evidence of my stupidity did not. Sucka ;)

:(

Sometimes stuff is really hard. I can do anything academically, or organizationally but give me something emotional to deal with, and I'm totally messed up. I never know how to handle things, so I just leave them alone. But then they fester and come back up, which many times is a good thing because I shouldn't have left them alone in the first place. But when they come back, it seems like it may have been easier to deal with it in the first place. It's too bad that I'm such an emotional "insert Bridget Jones' Diary word here." Some of you will know what that was supposed to be. I sometimes wonder if I have a certain GI disease exacerbated by stress, because when stuff like this happens- always emotional mind you, I can stress out for days on school and work and feel fine- my stomach ties in knots and I just want to puke for hours. (Attractive, huh?) Well, I just wanted to vent but now I'm going to lie in my bed and feel bad because that's what emotional "Bridget again" do. Laters.

Why me?

Last night, I got home and Rupal called me to go out with her and Carolyn. Apparently the law school was having an "end of finals party" at a bar in Homewood. Rupal did not want to go with Carolyn alone, because she didn't really know anyone and the probability of losing Carolyn in a crowded place is way high since she's a very little person. I mean, damn tiny. Soo, I decided to go with them. Not such a hot idea. We get there and it is the world's tiniest bar. Itty bitty. So we're crammed into this place like sardines, except we're not sardines, we're something else...like gummy worms. Trapped in a sardine can. It smells bad in the sardine can, and sardines are loud and obnoxious. Case in point: the sardine at the bar.

A little bit of backstory for those who don't know her- Rupal is gorgeous. She's a model and she's beautiful, and because of this, many many many guys hit on her. (Tip: Don't hit on her unless you have money, cause you're wasting your time.) So, we go up to the bar to grab a drink and there's this dude sitting there....has to be 30 something...if not older. He taps Rupal and tells her that she is the most beautiful thing he's ever seen and people must tell her that a lot, and can he have her number? So she smiles and says hell no, and you'd think that'd be it. No. He turns to me and proceeds to "hit on" me. I put "hit on" in cute little quotations because I've never been insulted while being hit on, but last night was a first. The guy, after complimenting Rupal up and down, turns to me and says, "you're beautiful, but in an understated way. You have to kind of look for it. You look really determined like you know what you want." At this point, I'm wandering away because he's really drunk and I'm kind of PO'd. And he grabs my arm and goes, "You just look like the kind of girl that would kick some ass."

This exchange brings up some interesting questions. I do consider myself very determined and kind of kickass. However, do I project that just walking around? I figured people wouldn't know that til they either crossed me or got to know me. It's very strange that some drunk dude at a bar would peg me like that. I mean, I wasn't wearing leather or carrying a whip or anything. I dunno. It was bee-czar. Well, food for thought. I'm off to work...buenas dias!

Friends don't let friends eat fish that smell like cigarettes.

So I went to Subway for lunch again today...making this 2 days in a row. Eating the same sandwich...at the same location...with the same person. It wasn't Groundhog Day, but it certainly seemed like it. That's beside the point. I ordered a tuna sandwich, because for some reason, veggie subs sick me out. I think it's because they get kind of soggy...soggy bread is so gross. I got to the table, opened my sandwich wrapper, and was greeted with the sickly smell of cigarettes. However, my co-luncher sniffed my sandwich, and detected no trace of the silent killer. Also, his sandwich didn't smell like mine, and his sandwich was identical to mine. So, I figured it had to be psychological and I bit into the sandwich. It tasted fine...so I ate it. After eating it, I could taste cigarettes. I tasted them all day long. Even while chewing gum and drinking Dr. Pepper, the taste of cigarette butts lingered in my mouth. So, I guess the lesson for the day kids, is don't eat tuna that smells like cigarettes. It's probably not a good idea. My lunch buddy should have stopped me. It's all his fault.

Depopulated

I'm beginning to understand why so many people get lonely at Christmas. There are so many memories associated with the holidays, and so much time to think about them. I've been missing Pranathi soo much lately- more than usual. But it's because I've been thinking about all the Christmases that we've spent together over the last few years. The lights I strung in my living room are identical to her set, and last year we hung them up together....as we did the year before. 2 years ago we bought them to hang in our living room...making the room more festive for a Christmas/graduation party we were throwing. That was the year of the MacGyver Christmas tree...literally held up with the miracle of dental floss. It was also the year that our other roommate got "drunk" off of a half a wine cooler and "passed out" in a chair. Pretty darn amusing. Last Christmas we hung up our lights in our 2 bedroom apartment- not for a party, although looking back most of our nights were like parties. Almost every night we sat around talking, laughing, eating (mostly stuff that was horrible for us) and watching "The Simpsons" like there was no tomorrow.

I'm not lonely...in fact, a few of my friends are doing quite an admirable job of keeping me entertained. Lonely isn't the right word...I just miss Pranathi. I think Lamartine said it best:

Sometimes

when one person is missing,

the whole world seems

depopulated.

Bedtime para mi.